i have a plan.

 

this is just a quick announcement now.
i had my birthday two days ago.
i just turned 52. it is incredible how quickly time flies.

up until a few years ago i had this feeling that my whole life is still ahead of me. that i have all the time in the world to make something out of myself and to explore things, so there's no need to rush.
well... not any more. for some time i have been feeling that time is running out. but i'm still in a kind of a funk. i dream about making art and making things but i rarely do. not never, just rarely. and in my opinion even that with too little structure.

i plan to change that. i wanted to change it last year too, and it didn't happen. so i'm not so sure it will happen in this next year in my life. i feel the pressure of time. but i really don't want to do it because of the pressure. i want to do it because i want to. because creating brings me joy. 

you see, when i was young i never shied away from trying things. i tried everything. i didn't finish everything, but i was not afraid of starting. i drew, i designed clothes, i made papier-mâché, i crocheted, i knitted (i never finished any knitting projects though, something was always missing, one sleeve, one sock, one glove...), i sewed (my sewing projects were more successful, i wore many of my self-made garments), i tried to make a tailor's dummy from of the cardboard tubes that fabrics came on, i batiked a shirt using wax as resist, i tie-dyed my jeans and painted another pair with wall paint. i never hesitated to try things and i loved it.

i don't know since when, maybe since the advent of the internet, but at a point in my life i started to live much more in my head and in my dreams and less in the physical world. and on the internet, of course. combined, on my pinterest, insta and my various computers and wd passports, i have at least a few hundred thousand images saved. this is not an exaggeration. images that i saved for my blog, images that i simply like and images saved with the exclamation "oooh, i wanna try that, too!".

so in this next year in my life i want to get back into getting my hands dirty. without the pressure of creating something that is "valuable". simply for the joy of creation.

i hope you'll follow me on this journey. i don't dare to share this on insta just yet, i figure that here there will be less people seeing my announcement. :)

next, i'll write a quick manifesto. 

above: the tip of the iceberg – a few pics from a private pinterest page of mine.